a man walks away
when every muscle says to stay.
how many yesterdays? they each way heavy.
who says what changes may come
who says what we call home.
I know you see right through me,
my luminescence fades,
the dusk provides an antidote, I am not afraid.
I've been a million times, in my mind,
this is really just a technicality.
frailty. reality.
It's time to breathe. time to believe.
let it go and run towards the sea.
they don't teach that,
they don't know what you mean
they don't understand,
they don't know what you mean.
they don't get it, I want to scream.
I want to breathe again, I want to dream.
I want to float a quote from Martin Luther King
I am not afraid I am not afraid I am not afraid...
from REM's The Outsiders on Around the Sun
(Buck, Mills, Stipe)
I watched an interview with Michael Stipe last night. It was done about two months ago in Australia on a program called Enough Rope. I admit, I'm a fan of his. What I love most is his use of language, how he captures fleeting moments in non-linear wordscapes and images. Yet to my soul it all makes sense. The timbre of his voice, his accent, the music, all sit well with me, nourish me. There's a familiarity, a poetic sensiblility that only needs half words and hints to shine through. And that kind of sensibility has its flip side too. Vulnerability, pain, flight, escape, 'seeing through' with faraway, wise eyes, being and not being present, picking up vibes. He talked about when he was a child and how he felt when something was wrong in the environment around him, that he was the one to voice it. To ask what was going on. He talked a lot on the program, and seemed to open up, state things directly and honestly. His discussion of topics, his very essensce, was mercurial: he joked and smiled, became serious, almost grey, his eyes so filled yet so vacant; he left so many times. He revealed so many shades of himself.
What struck me though, and I mean really struck my heart, was when he suddenly, after talking about high school, said:
I consider myself to still be kind of a nerd and not particularly talented, attractive, interesting, intelligent or anything else. I used to wonder why my friends hung out with me. Then, you know, of course a little bit later in life I figured out that I do have qualities that are worth while. The degree to which I apply myself as an artist, as a song writer, is at the very least absolutely sincere and giving everything that I can. And that counts for something.
These words seemed to come out of nowhere. And they took me aback. His honesty touched me. As with everyone, he has darkness, and maybe most importantly, he's not afraid to show it, to open it up for others to see. That is human. That is real. And it's what can connect us as much as love, for it too is love. To be able to go easily to one's dark spots and take other people along is truly a gift. It's about the whole picture, the shadow and light. The expression of both, the living of both, is what artists seem to strive for, what the poetic space is all about.
If you want to catch the interview, it's streaming at REM's website
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